एक गाव

एक छान गाव होतं.

एका मोठ्या शहराच्या हद्दीला लागूनच हे आपलं गाव. भरपूर झाडी, नदीकिनारी, शेती वगैरे असलेलं.. त्या गावातली लोकं अत्यंत सुखासमाधानाने राहायची, पंचक्रोशीत कोणाचेही कोणाशी तंटे नाहीत, भांडणं नाहीत..
त्या गावाची माहिती एका प्रधानाला कळली. प्रधान गावाच्या भेटीला आला, सामान्य वेशात, कोणालाही कळणार नाही असा. त्यानं शेतजमीन बघितली, काही नमुने गोळा केले आणि तज्ज्ञांना दाखवायला म्हणून घेऊन गेला.
जाता चहाला थांबला असताना त्याला एका गावकऱ्यानी विचारलं, "कुठुनसा आलास बा?"
"मी? शेजारच्या शहरातून!" प्रधान उत्तरला.
"काय काम काढलं हिकडं गावात?" गावकरी.
"तुमच्या शेतीबद्दल बरंच ऐकलंय, एक दोन चार बिघा जमीन घ्यावी म्हणतो" प्रधान.
"चांगलीच आहे जमीन, पण इकायला कोणी काढलीय?" गावकरी.
"पैसे देईन ना भरपूर!" प्रधान
गावकाऱ्याला काय बोलू कळलंच नाही. पैसे समोर आल्यावर काय करायचं त्या पैशांचं? पोरं सुखानी राहतायत. कुटुंबाला व्यवस्थित खायला मिळतंय. मग कशाला हवेत अजून पैसे, असा त्याचा माफक प्रश्न.
"चला येतो" प्रधान म्हणाला, आणि निघाला.
"हां, या परत!" गावकरी स्वतःच्याच तंद्रीत म्हणाला
"यावंच लागेल" प्रधान मिश्किल हसत हसत निघून गेला
गावकाऱ्याला पडलेला प्रश्न अजून सुटेच ना! पैसे मिळाल्यावर करायचं काय? असो, वेळ आली की बघू, असं म्हणत त्यांनी चहा संपवला आणि आपल्या घराकडे निघाला.
घरी आला, बायकोला किस्सा सांगितला, बायको म्हणाली "तुम्ही ना मुलुखाचे वेंधळे, सांगायचं की, आमची थोडी जमीन घ्या विकत तुम्ही, आणि त्या बदल्यात पैसे घ्या"
गावकरी म्हणाला, "पण त्या पैशांचं करायचं काय?"
बायको म्हणाली, "बँकेत टाकायचे, व्याजावर, खूप मिळतं म्हणे तिकडे शहरात!" "पण आपली गरज आहे तितके पैसे मिळतात आपल्याला, वर उरतात सुद्धा थोडे. जमीन वगैरे मी काही विकणार नाही."
हा विषय त्या घरात तिथेच थांबला, बायको बिचारी चरफडत राहिली.

त्या रात्री त्या गावकाऱ्याला झोप लागली नाही. तोच प्रश्न त्याच्या डोक्यात घोळत राहिला, "पैशांचं करायचं काय?"

दिवसामागून दिवस गेले, पावसाळा गेला, मग अचानक राजानी गावात दवंडी पिटवली, राजाचा दरबार भरणार आहे गावात.
"आपल्या गावात राजा येणार? किती छान!" गाव एखाद्या नुकत्याच वयात आलेल्या मुलीसारखं सजलं. गावाला सजवण्यात आपला गावकरी पण आघाडीवर होता!

राजा आला! त्यानी विचारलं, "तुमच्यापैकी किती जण शेजारच्या सुंदर शहरात जाऊन आला आहात?"
काही तुरळक हात वर आले
"बरं, तुमच्यापैकी किती जण तिथे राहून आला आहात?"
कोणाचाच हात वर आला नाही, लोकांना कळतंच नव्हतं की राजाला नक्की काय म्हणायचं आहे.
राजा म्हणाला, "बरं, तुम्ही शहरात गेला नाहीत म्हणून काय झालं, शहर तुमच्याकडे येऊ शकतं ना!" गावकरी अजून बुचकळ्यात.
"आज आम्ही एक निर्णय घेतला आहे, तुमच्या शेतजमिनीपैकी प्रत्येकानी थोडी थोडी जमीन राज्याला दान करायची, दान कशाला, राज्य ती जमीन पैसे देऊन कागदोपत्री व्यवहार करून विकत घेईल, तुम्हाला त्याचे भरपूर पैसे मिळतील"
आपला गावकरी राजा बोलता बोलताच मध्ये उठला, उभा राहिला, आणि त्यानी राजाला सवाल केला, "पण या पैशाचं करायचं काय?" प्रधान लगबगीने त्याच्याकडे आला, "सांगतो", आणि त्याला बाजूला घेऊन गेला.
मग राजानी सगळ्या गावाला, गावकऱ्यांना शहराचे फायदे सांगायला सुरुवात केली.
"भरपूर पाणी, वीज, पक्के रस्ते".. वगैरे वगैरे..
"हे शहर झालं की बाहेरची, विदेशातली लोकं इथे राहायला येतील, त्यांच्यामुळे तुमच्या धंद्याला, मालाला अजून उठाव मिळेल".. वगैरे वगैरे..
"तुम्हाला शेती सोडून देता येईल, तुमच्या पोरं बाळांना शेती करायची नसेल तर त्यांना सुद्धा काही वेगळे उद्योग करता येतील, त्यासाठी मी कर्ज देईन" वगैरे वगैरे..
गावातली तरूण जनता या शब्दगणिक भुलत चालली होती, नागोबाच्या पुंगीवर डुलत चालली होती.

काळ लोटला, लोक बदलले, त्या गावाचं शहर होतंय!
भरपूर पाणी, वीज, पक्के रस्ते.. बाहेरची, विदेशातली लोकं, धंद्याला, मालाला अजून उठाव, पोराबाळांचे वेगळे उद्योग, हे सगळं होता होता त्या गावचं गावपणच हरवतंय, मोठ्या मोठ्या गाड्या रस्त्यावरून फिरू लागल्या, पण त्या गाड्या वेगात जाताना रस्ता कसा ओलांडायचा हेच या गावकऱ्यांना कळत नाहीये. आपला माल कसा विकायचा आणि आपल्याला अजून अजून पैसेच कसे मिळतील याच्या मागे सगळेच पाळतायत

पण त्या गावकाऱ्याला पडलेल्या प्रश्नाचं उत्तर मात्र अजून कोणालाच सापडलं नाही, "या पैशांचं करायचं काय?"

ता. क. - या कथेचा हिंजवडीशी संबंध जाणवला तर तो योगायोग समजावा!

Love time!

While writing this I already have hit the sack but feeling insomniac.
Just a few thoughts about the Valentine's Day..

The last time I checked, this was supposed to be a day to celebrate love. Not a day that would make us feel lonely, and sad, and sometimes just desperate. We all feel lost sometimes but it almost seems like this day is now designed to make us feel more lost. If romantic love has entered your life, that's wonderful. Try to take out some time today and acknowledge it. If love has not swept you off your feet yet, it will come to you when it is ready. You can't find love, love will have to find you, and it will. Your only job is to make sure you let it in when it does find you. Its when you are not expecting it that it will hit you hardest — and isn't that what makes life so tragically wonderful?

Until then, trust that the universe knows what it is doing and focus on making yourself better for when love does come knocking at your door or bumping into you around the corner of a coffee shop. You must learn to be patient.

Just remember today that you are not alone, unless you choose to be, and deep down inside you, you already know that.

His Confession

It seems like my words have just been reduced to one woman. When I write to her my heart turns into oceans and my words to shores. All the ocean knows is to come back to the shore, with no two waves alike. I can describe her almost perfectly.. from the spontaneous energy in her kajal-eyes to her beautiful fingers, and to that faint scar on her forehead. She talks of some great people and madness. She smells of euphoria and happiness. Her eyes look of intellect and soulful desire. She listens to my life. She makes me long to lie with her. And when she looks at the low moon in the winter sky surrounded by the mountains of forever -my words just can't stop spinning. Every time this moon shines, it witnesses the overwhelming emotion in my heart, and perhaps it nods at my determination to hold her tighter than time.

I want to write something heart-wrenching beautiful. I want to write something that would crawl under the readers' skin and reduce their souls to shreds. I want to write with the longing that we dare not talk about, the suffering that we carefully tuck away between layers and layers of darkness and secrets. I want my words to dance on their wildest imagination; crack their hearts open so that new light can shine through. But I am just useless.

Lately, I write to find that moment - the moment that led to me this madness.

-omi

Madness...

Writing after a long time guys!!
Hope you like it!

She was desperate to find something, anything that would soothe her ache. She wanted to not feel the craziness of her heart. She wanted to forget and not want the things she couldn't have. She wanted to exchange her burned, scarred heart with a brand new one, and she was desperately hunting for the clean heart, for a fresh start.

When she met him, she knew. She knew it was the purest heart she could find, and she had to have it. She was so desperate to clean herself that she did not care if she dirtied him in the process. So the first opportunity she got, she pounced. She dug her nails in his skin, and ripped his chest out. And there it was, the most beautiful thing in the world, and she was about to have it. She was about to rid herself of all her crazy, and all the her madness. It was wonderful.

And yet, no matter what she did, she couldn't take it. He was smarter than she thought, he was better than she thought. She wanted a fix, and he wouldn't allow it. He actually loved her. It was almost cruel.

All she ever wanted was a man who would soothe her madness. That was the only way she knew. But he only burned it more, made her crazier. He was right: the cure was not to fix the crazy but to accept it. She wanted to forget. He made it okay for her to remember

Wish you a very Happy New Year!! God bless!

-omi

I love you..

When wandering through the internet and different webpages, I found an interesting article.
It was about greeks and their myths and beliefs. And take my point mates, they made sense..

Here is an extract..

Those Greeks had a very logical reason for the existence of a "soul mate".
They believed that humans initially had two heads, four arms and four legs.
They were then cut into half (not exactly, but yes.. cut is the most appropriate word I could find) as a consequence of some form of disobedience to the gods, thus creating the modern human, who was left to search for his or her other half - the soul mate.

A new age belief is that souls are made with a direct connection to one another, in pairs as they say, and it is the other pair of your soul, that is your ultimate soul mate.

In the life of every person, there is "at least one person" (yes, true for many!) with whom we make a very deep connection. The connection at times is too deep, beyond our greatest and wildest dreams.

And my dreams - the deams in my mind, the ambition that fuels my ideas, the mischief that runs through my brain, the light that permeates my eyes, the invisible tickle that makes me smile....

It's all you.

I just cant wait for your answer!!!
I.. am already yours!

Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara....

They say sometimes you have to be lost to find your way. I have stayed away from this place for a while now. And it has allowed me to look at *Panorama* from a distance, and I realized that in the thirst for being appreciated, I stopped doing on this site what I loved most - writing for the sake of writing itself. Writing became more a means to massage my ego than being happy. So in true spirit of the change, I am going to base this article on a completely unpretentious topic - a movie review!

'Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara' by Zoya Akhtar was a rather surprise delight. For the first time in a long while, I left the theatre feeling happy and light. Comedy films entertain you for a bit, but the laughter dies down later on. Drama films, when good, get you to think about serious issues, but the strain is unsustainable for long periods of time - and you soon tend to put it out of your mind and move on. But this film is different. More than laugh, it makes you smile. And by the end just delivers a simple message - as if saying - "Hey You!, Smile you idiot ( or sometimes - jerk! ) - you are alive and breathing, be happy for that" And truly celebrates the act of simply being alive. The jokes are practical and down to earth. The kind of fun you can encounter in real life when you are hanging out with friends. (There are many situations where we find that the jokes which we crack are much better than these.. but lets assume that they have a different style than ours.. )

The story is actually a snapshot of 3 lives for a week. Of three close friends meeting for a vacation. All of them are in some way occupied by their problems and baggages. But by the end of it, they realize that sometimes letting go is the best thing you can do to help yourself. The message is nuanced and I am not sure how well it might be received in main stream Indian audience. But the film is technically sound and should do very well none the less. (okay, i know you all know the theme.. but wanted to revise it.. ! :) )

The direction is simple, sometimes too simple but the photography is breath taking. The film aptly shows the coming of age for Bollywood and in some sense India itself. It has a global presence and theme to it. The shooting is on par with the best of the film industry. Larger than life when needed, it is still grounded enough to actually move you when intended. The music is exhilarating, fresh and alive in every beat. Guitar is to Spanish music what tabla is to Indian. And in this film, the songs are mostly guitar based. This gives them a simplicity and freshness that is the exact opposite of the audio palette of a semi-classical Indian song. The lyrics are beautiful and Javed Akhtar's poetry is sublime. I loved the cast, its youthful, uncomplicated and multinational. The kind of global citizens modern Indian youth would aspire to be. Hritik Roshan is subdued but ever present, he is too much of a star to be just a mere part of the story, Abhay Deol is pleasant and grows on you. But the real surprise is Farhan Akhtar - this is an actor who plays well within his own limits, and his rendition of the comedy is the most natural I have encountered on screen in a while. Katrina Kaif does her part well. It is impossible to ignore her when she is in the frame. And in some instances, you really do forget to follow the dialogues, the scenery and be simply in awe of how gorgeous she can be. (I can be biased.. ;) )

The location of Spain has clearly paid off. And for the song of "Senorita" - which is partly spanish, adds beautiful authenticity to the play. You have to give it up for the music director's guts to let a song be in a foreign language - and trust it entirely to the rhythm for the audience to love it. The Senorita song demonstrates aptly the sensuality and pleasure that is inherent in Spain and its singers. It is a remarkable contrast to the Indian culture. Where often times, in favor of seeking spirituality, pleasure is looked down upon. The Spanish culture on the other hand celebrates pleasures and the people for wanting it. These are a people who are not afraid to ask for extra helpings of ice cream, a more toungy kiss, an extra night with a lover and have a society that won't fault them for wanting it. It makes their poetry extremely sensual and its honest expression, endearingly human.

It complements the film beautifully in its message for asking people to celebrate life. Well - whats new about that ? True, we have heard these cliches for so long, we probably just tune them out by now. But there is something to it. A few years ago I became friends with a person who was genuinely happy. Not that there weren't any problems or sadness - but for the most part, this person was - happy. It got me thinking and I discovered the secret of happy people - they are truly able to live every moment. I know, I know ... what does that even mean - are we to stop our car every time we see a sunset or what .. Imagine that you are having a dinner party and are cooking for your friends. To indulge yourself, you are having a small cup of ice cream while cooking. And while chopping your veggies, you accidentally cut your finger. Most people will completely focus on the finger and the pain, its overwhelming and begs attention. The happy people I have found - can not only attend to the cut, but also savor the ice cream they were having in the first place. The thing is life seldom serves you ice creams on a plate with no distractions. And most of us when we think of happiness, want that unadulterated, undiluted and undisturbed experience of happiness. The trick is to savor a happy moment regardless of where it occurs. So if you enjoy rain, enjoy rain even when its because you have a flat tire and you are forced to stand on the road. And the people we find are most happy - are the people who are better at this. They don't lie to themselves or ignore their problems, but they don't trash the good things thoughtlessly either. And there lies the message of the film, so go out and see it and enjoy it. Go for a run, an evening walk, sit by the sea or like in my case, just get over yourself and write! Yes the Mantall the Bouys.. Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara...

Stupid...

You know how we say, 'It is too good to be true?' How when something so wonderful happens that we can't help but thank our stars and feel so overwhelmed that we have to utter with joy: Oh, you are too good to be true!

But do you know what the actual, original phrase is? It's, "If it's too good to be true, then it probably is." I don't know why we take out the last half of the quote. We choose to focus on the half truth and not face the reality.
Like she did.
Perhaps, she didn't get the memo - she didn't realize that when someone is too good to be true, he probably isn't. she is a stupid girl who believed it when he said he loved her. She was the stupid girl who didn't see the heinousness behind those cute eyes she adored. She gave in, she fell hard, and was trapped in his spell that she couldn't look beyond him. She couldn't see what he was doing to her. She couldn't decipher his plan. She couldn't see how he would use the doll that she was and then throw her out in search of another prettier one. Perhaps because he liked blond dolls and she is dark haired. Perhaps because it was all a game for him - her emotions, her life, was nothing but a game to boast in front of others. Perhaps he thought that somehow he would be more of a man if he could conquer her. Perhaps because he always thought she was stupid while telling her how smart he was. Perhaps, because she really is stupid.

If it is too good to be true, dear readers, it really is. Always, always remember that.

२ कप्पे...

म्हणतात नं..
हृदयाचे २ कप्पे असतात..
एक.. रक्त पुरवठा वगैरे कामं करण्यासाठी...
आणि दुसरा.. प्रेम करण्यासाठी..
..
एक.. कधी रडण्यासाठी..
आणि दुसरा.. कधी प्रेमाचा सुगंध पसरवण्यासाठी..
..
एक.. आकाशाएवढा विशाल..
दुसरा.. धरणीसारखा.. शांत.. शीतल.. कणखर..
..
एक.. गारवा देणारा..
दुसरा.. प्रेमाची उब देणारा..
..
एक.. अज्ञात हळूवार लाट..
दुसरा.. मऊशार वाळूचा काठ..
..
एक.. सुरेख बांधणीचं पुस्तक..
दुसरा.. एक हवंहवंसं मृगजळ...
..
एक.. टवटवीत फुलांचा ताटवा..
दुसरा.. एक चमचमता काजवा..
..
एक.. जुनी न भरलेली जखम...
दुसरा.. नुकताच झालेला एक घाव..
..

या जखमांना हात नसतो लावायचा..
खपली पडायची भीती असते...
पण हो..
जिच्याकडे माझं हृदय आहे,
तिच्याकडेच आहे सगळं..
स्वप्नं.. इच्छा.. आकांक्षा.. आशा..
आणि आमच्या सुखाच्या दालनाच्या किल्ल्या..
कायमच्या..



love you!

-omi

change.. it happens...

Every time you leave someone behind or they decide to quit on you, things don't remain the same. There's always a change - sometimes a major change or sometimes just a minor one which you brush off.
Whether you miss these people from your life or not, they change you in a certain way and then they come back to you in pieces, years after they are gone.
Some come in dreams, others come in places, a few in songs here and there, and many on occasions and festivals.

Here is the interesting thing about life:
It kicks you down, in fact it kicks you while you are down. It brutally bashes you and breaks your bones - one at a time - so that you do not miss out on the pain. Life is not a disaster, it is a slow torture. But just when you think that you cannot go on any longer, and life is convinced that you have given up, it brings you flowers and tend to your wounds and helps you get up on your feet only to knock you down some other time. At the end of it all, it is such a humbling experience.

and I love my life.. it teaches us to get up and fight! \m/ :)



-omi

Compatibility

People in this world are not like a piece of glass that you can look though see the other side.
People are more like diamonds, which when held against light reflect and deflect light so that a myriad of colors are seen.
Lets agree on a point.. We’re complex.

People have a lots of interests and what interests me may or may not interest you.
Even though interests are numerous, you are bound to find a lot of people who share your interests.

So, what are your interests? That is something for you to think about.

You might have to do some serious thinking before you level down your preferences. There might be a lot of things that you enjoy doing but you rarely get a chance to do.

Once you have decided on what your interests are then half the story is done. For the other part of the story, you need to sit and think about what you would like in another person. Having the same interests doesn’t necessarily mean that you can get along with a person.

For example, if you are a person who likes to talk a lot, it doesn’t mean that you could like another person who likes to talk a lot as well. If two people try to keep talking at the same time then obviously, there cannot be any dialogue.

So also, if you are the silent reserved type and the other person is too, the there will hardly be any dialogue at all! The word over here is “compatible.”
The interests of partners should complement each other and not clash.

So, sit down right now and do some thinking.
Start to get a picture of exactly what you are looking for before you ever start trying to find someone online.

Hello, Happiness!!

The question is not if you can do something with someone. You can almost always find something to do with anyone but the question is if you can do nothing with someone.

All our lives, we try to fill our time and mind with meaningless somethings. We believe that if we could fill that void with something, we will be happier. But its not about the something.
True happiness comes when you can sit with someone and do absolutely nothing, and not feel like you have to.
Happiness is when you don't feel awkward about it, when you don’t have to continuously please someone to get their attention or get their affection because they are already pleased just because you are in vicinity.
Happiness is when you don’t have to plan every single evening.
Happiness is when you can be spontaneous, and you can only be spontaneous when you don't fear that you're going to be judged for being silly or downright crazy.

Happiness is simple.

Its not what they make it out to be.

Happiness is not in expensive gifts and restaurants and crazy amounts of work.
Happiness is in holding hands and knowing that you can hold that hand.
Happiness is sitting in a hot-dog joint and wiping mustard off of each others collars.
Happiness is when someone kisses your hands - if you haven't tried it, try it.

You'll know what I mean.

Some people don’t get it, but happiness really IS simple.

Retrospect

Believe me, dear readers, please believe me when I say this: sometimes we really are running after the wrong things - chasing the wrong men and women totally convinced that they are the right ones for us. No matter what they say, or how they try to assure us otherwise, we still believe that what we are doing is right. Believe me when I say that we are stubborn and this stubbornness is the cause of our demise.

It is so hard to let go off our control. We think we know what is right. We think that the people we are running after are the people we are meant to be with - that there is nothing better than them. Its so extremely difficult to let go of that control, and be patient with life, believe in a higher power and let the universe decide once in a while.

I am guilty of all of this. I think I know what’s best for me. I think I know the people I want to associate myself with. I think I know who I should be romantically involved with and who I shouldn’t.
.
.
.
.
.
But the truth is, I have very limited knowledge of all of these things.

I kept running after the wrong women, when the right one was there all along, and I almost screwed it up. I was so convinced that I wouldn't be happier with any other woman than the one I was chasing. I was so sure of myself, until I crashed. The biggest challenge in life is to let go. Its when you let go, you are able to see what the universe has in store for us. We don’t even give the universe a chance - because we think we have it all figured out. Total bullshit.

Please look around you.
Please look and see the people who are looking at you.
Please don’t be so convinced that you know what is right.
Believe.
Have faith.
Give people a chance.
Don’t make the mistake I made.
Please.
You deserve to be happy.

:)


inspired from the new DoCoMo ad :

Keep it simple! Silly! ;)

I am Waiting...

I think that I am waiting. Waiting for someone - something - to happen. It is not as if I am waiting for someone to come and change my life drastically, or to be my savior, or fill a void in my heart. No, its none of these things because I know that I am capable of change, there is no need for saving and I am not haunted by any emptiness. It is not as if something is lacking or missing - my cup is full.

The truth is, I am always producing and hoarding more love inside me, but there is no release. I want it to flow now. I want that over whelming feeling of joy - that which I would not have to contain. But my cup is not brimming. It is as if I am there but I am not quite there yet. There's nothing worse than waiting and not knowing what'll happen to you. Your own imagination can be crueler than any captor.

यादें.. ( I )

कुछ यह है की मुद्दतों से हम भी नहीं थे रोए..
कुछ जहन में उलझा था अहबाब का दिलासा...
फिर यूँ हुआ..
के सावन आँखों में आ बसे थे...
फिर यूँ हुआ..
के दिल भी था अबला सा..
अब सच कहें तो यारो हमको खबर नहीं थी...
बन जायेगा क़यामत एक वाकिया ज़रा सा...
तेवर थे बेरुखी के.. अंदाज़ थे दोस्ती के..
वोह अजनबी थे लेकिन लगते थे अपने से...
हम दश्त थे के दर्या....
हम जहर थे के अमृत..
नाहक था जहम हमको.. जब वोह नहीं थे प्यासे..
हम ने भी इसको देखा.. कल शाम इत्तफाक से...

इतनाही कह पाए हक से...
अपने भी हाल है लोगो.. अब इस "omi" से

Star-Light!!!

I was walking within my apartment complex the other day - the hour was late and most of the world around me had already retired. The designers of my residence were thoughtful enough to include a long walking trail on the perimeter of our premises. It is aesthetic and wild with many a turn - winding through gorgeous tall trees and surrounded by beautiful foliage. In the day it thrives in the balmy summer air and bird songs while during the night it cultivates a cool breeze and the gentle rustle of tree leaves. A singular section of this trail goes through an open grass land - and on this particular night the sky was so clear that the stars above took my breath away!!! It caused me to pause my walk and lie down - and to think and reflect ....

I was distracted initially and I had a million things on my mind mostly revolving around my career, responsibilities and personal life - but after a while those thoughts settled and I felt anew a sense of calm - and in the silence of that moment - there was no one and nothing between me and the stars. My breaths deepened and I felt myself intoxicated with awareness, for a brief period of time, we were breathing in complete harmony - me and the night around me.

I have always loved stars, back in school I had managed to save up enough pocket money to make my own telescope. This tube of lenses was my portal to the universe. Every week, I used to squeeze out some time - and away from the prying eyes of the world, I would escape to a tryst with these diamonds in the sky.

Stars have a unique way of inspiring and humbling the human mind. They have been for centuries. Thousands of years ago, people of almost every civilization looked at the heavens above - at the same very patterns we see today - and tried to connect these revolving lights with the events of their lives. Almost anyone who has held an audience with the stars quickly comes to realize how minuscule human life really is. The sheer scale of the universe is staggering and quite beyond the realms of the most gifted of imaginations. Science itself has been trying mightily to encapsulate and explain the entire universe through one unified theory - from ether to the big bang - from string theory to the membrane, each time we thought we've found the answers - we've discovered - that we couldn't be more wrong. Even though I am a deep rooted and honest to GOD student of science - I find this human urge - 'to explain everything around them' - quite amusing, futile and of late unnecessary.

What we do know is that a long time ago, our Sun and it surrounding planets evolved from the gasses and elements of this universe - first the star and then the planets around it ...... and eventually at one point - Life. Our comprehension and view of the universe has often times been too narrow and revolving only around the time the human species came into prominence on life upon Earth. Too often do we forget - that before us there was another species which ruled - that after us there still might be another creation to flourish and that before any of it we all really were just bubbles of elements boiling in hot lava.

The intervention of that night's silence and its probe into my mind made me realize that often times we choose to dwell solely upon human life - and only our lives at that. We surround ourselves with news and gossip - we argue and laugh amongst our friends - we fall in love and we fight - we hate and we fall in love all over again - we live and we die within and only within this tiny slice of time. While important, I find this view of life rather limited and sorely incomplete.

I believe - failing to realize how minute and inconsequential our existence is - prevents us from understanding the true significance of life - and from admiring the true beauty of creation. Right before my conversation with the stars - I was stuck in a hard place in my life, one where I was perpetually worried that I might live my entire existence without making any significant contribution to the world. The dialogue helped me put all of my anxiety into perspective.

The truth is we were all born out of this universe and when we die - we will all be part of this universe again. This concept was proven by Einstein but very few people choose to see it this way. There was a time in my life when I felt all living creatures were infinitely superior to dead things - like rocks and sand - where as the truth in fact is that the same elements that make all of our planets, make the rock and the same elements make us. We worry about causing the planet damage. Yes, its bad - and we shouldn't pollute - but its bad only for all life on earth - which - in the scheme of things is just a blip in the universe. I guess the point I am trying to drive home is that we make too much of ourselves. We have invested so much time and energy in trying to keep us alive for as long as possible - believing that a human life - rather a human's consciousness of life is the all essential thing to preserve - all the time failing to realize that it is the shortness and unpredictability of life that makes it so beautiful.

As I lay on that cold earth - in total peace - I felt for the first time as being one with the universe. All the problems and uncertainty of my life still remained - but I could clearly hear what the starlight had whispered to me - That millions of years from now, when I would be no more - when Earth might be no more - we will all still, be a part of this universe - and perhaps some day a small boy on the top of a roof on some remote planet will see me as a speck of light - and be delighted once again as I was - this beautiful night.

The only true meaning of life - I have come to believe is in enjoying our existence and feel - in each breath what our senses tell us. To find peace and happiness rooted in the certainty of our mortality and to enjoy this transient bijou we call life. We are after all - simply Starlight!!

Someone Up There is Very Happy for Them!

His eyes fluttered open as the sun rays welcomed him through the window. He wondered if they had left the curtain open. Half asleep he tried to see why the sun was shining right in his eyes. After fully opening his eyes, he realized that the curtains were drawn but a mischievous corner was letting the sun rays come in which happened to land right on his face. It was Sunday and he was not waking up so early. So, he got up, cursing underneath his breath he straightened the curtain and came back to bed. It was then when he saw her lying next to him. As always he couldn’t take his gaze off of her and couldn’t help but wonder how anyone could be as beautiful as she was and how in the world had such a beautiful woman landed on his bed, not only for one day but for an entire lifetime?!

Someone up there must have been very happy with her.

He grinned at the thought and snuggled with her to take a closer look. As he touched her she tossed in her sleep and like always she set the blanket straight on him putting her hand on his chest.

Her care had never stopped even when she was asleep. How could she know every time he was not in the blanket? He could never answer that question, but then again he could never answer a lot of the questions he had about her, like, how she always figured out that he was in trouble. He used to get her phone calls at the oddest times asking him if everything was ok. She would call him exactly at the time when he needed to talk to someone, but how in the world did she know when she had been miles away from him?

“I just get a bad feeling, honey, I can feel it inside”, was always her answer.

Instinctively, he kissed her forehead and took her in his arms like a little child. Well, that was what she was—a little child. A very spoilt one, for that matter.

She had been the wildest woman he ever met. She had the most outrageous ideas and was never afraid to break the rules. He had not seen a woman so bold and passionate. She was fiery in her attitude and he knew that the passion in her eyes attracted him to her in the first place. Over time, he realized that she had the kindest heart and she loved him deeply. However, he was never able to tame her. He tried for a while but it didn’t happen. She was not meant to be tamed. She was the go-getter and no one could stop her. He learned to live with it. But, he loved her with all his heart, and he loved her for her passion, for her love of life, for her wildness. She showed him a whole different world—her world. Her beautiful world that he had become a part of. He had never regretted anything about his life. He knew she was the one when he had proposed her and he knew she was his destiny the day they got married.

In each and every one of us there is a longing to be understood by someone who really cares. When a person is understood, he or she can put up with almost anything in the world.

She understood him. She understood him more than anyone else and the realization made him want to break down and cry. Just how many people could say this years after their marriage? Both of them had been really lucky. He knew he was just… blessed.

He tilted his head and looked at her again. She was peaceful with her lips almost curling up in a smile, her ravishing long hair covering half of her face. Anyone seeing her angelic face peacefully sleeping could have never guessed that the night before in her pajamas, she was dancing hysterically on some random hip hop beats. She was laughing and dancing all over him.

“I want to parttttyyyy”, she said with her arms in the air.

“Sweety, I have told you, you can go out with your friends on weekends”, he had said without taking his eyes off the book he was reading.

“No, not that kind of party”, she replied making a face. “I want to party with you, just the two of us, you know”. She put her head on his lap distracting him from his reading.

“You are soo boring Mr.’, she complained snatching the book from him.

“What do you want me to do?”

“I want you to kiss me”, she said seriously.

She has always been bold like that.

Only a woman can make a man come to his knees and leave him breathless.

For him that woman has been her. He smiled and leaned forward to kiss her, but she pulled back.

"Now what???"

“If you think this is so easy, you are oh-so wrong! You want it, you have to come and get it,” she said grinning and ran off the bed.

The next half hour was spent chasing her throughout the house and he had only been able to catch her after she was tired of running and gave in to him, and that was how they both landed on the bed where she was still sleeping.

She just had too much energy, like a little kid who would only sleep when he is utterly exhausted. She was a full time job for him.

His mind fully awake then, he decided there was no point in lying down on the bed. He was awake and it was time for him to wake her up too. He decided the same tactic he used every time—kiss her lips. She didn’t wake up but he could see a little smile curling her lips.
He brushed her hair with his hands. Touched her eyes lightly with his fingers, whispered in her ears asking her to wake up but she didn’t move. However her face expression clearly told him that she didn’t want to wake up just yet. He tossed her body straight in an attempt to wake her up. After some more teasing here and there, he was still unable to get her attention. Finally he gave up and said loudly.

“Hey woman, wake up, your man needs breakfast.”

“He can go and make himself some,’ was the grumpy reply.

“You know I am not going to cook, after all these years you should know that.”

“ummmm…. Nooo.. mee sleepy…. You sleepy”, she groaned never opening her eyes.

“Ok I am getting up then and leaving you alone in the bed,” he knew she hated when he would leave her sleeping like that.

“No”, was a simple reply.

“Oh yeah? Well I am outta here.”

He decided to get up when she pulled herself on top of him, snuggling her head in his neck.

“Who is getting up now?”

He was going to have her way this time too and he knew that. Besides, her touch was so addicting, he didn’t feel like letting go.

Giving up, he wrapped his arms around her;

this time surely someone up there was very happy with him.

Gift yourself a Quiet Moment...

Here's a gift you may not have expected. It is a gift for you to give yourself. Sometimes in your day to day life, try to turn off all the noises you can around you and give yourself some "quiet time". In the silence, let yourself think about something. Or if possible... Think about nothing.

Most of us have so few moments like that in our lives. There are noises everywhere. There are times when we can't even escape. Television and radio are probably the worst culprits. They are very seductive. It's so tempting for some people to turn on the television set or the radio when they first walk into a room or get in the car....To fill any space with noise. It is even true with myself. I cannot help but turn on music as soon as I walk in my room. Whenever I am walking alone, I have my wiped screaming in my ears. I wonder what I or people similar to me are afraid might happen in the silence. Some of us must have forgotten how nourishing silence can be. We don't give us the opportunity to take benefit feelings that silence has to offer.

The kind of solitude goes by many names. It may be called "meditation" or "deep relaxation" or just "downtime". In some circles it may even be criticized as "daydreaming". Whatever its called, it is a time away from outside stimulation, during which inner turbulence can settle, and we have a chance to become more familiar with ourselves.

How many times have you noticed that its the little quiet moment in the midst of life that seems to give the rest the extra-special meaning??? How many times have we tried to understand that silence speaks in the language that the heart, soul and mind can fully understand?? How many times have we realized that silence can be holy?

So, give yourself a gift today.....

Men are from Earth and Women too

Ok, I am no advice columnist, neither a psychologist nor specialized in any way in either men’s or women's psychology.
I am just another man who has his opinions.

They say, men and women always end up on the opposite ends.
Women complain about how insensitive and "gross" and "lame" men are and men whine about the cry-babies women can turn into.
Granted, there are differences but we have to learn to live with them, right?

Lets start with relationships.
Men are committed. Period.
If a man is committed to a woman once probably he will remain committed to the "same woman" for the rest of his life. But the problem is that women don’t really know when the man is really committed. Sometimes women "think" men are serious about the relationship but they are not and then they "cheat" on the women.

folks, see... its all about perception!!

Ok, now consider this:
When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girl-friends, ( not girlfrnds, ideally :P ) and she will write a poem titled.. ummm...yeah, something like - "All Men Are Idiots".
Then she will get on with her life.

A man has a little more trouble letting go. Six months after the break-up, at 3:00 a.m. on a Saturday night, he will call and say, "I just wanted to let you know you ruined my life, and I’ll never forgive you, and I hate you, and you’re a total floozy. But I want you to know there’s always a chance for us".

men will always be men.. why the hell we feel "Unsecured"; we don't know..

Another thing women need to understand and tolerate is that men are big kids ( Com’ on guys, accept it! we actually are. ) Deep down, all men are big ol' boys. ( This explains why so many grown men wear baseball caps. ) Their interests are boy-like, too. Take his obsession with sports. Most men love anything that involves kicking something, throwing things or punching other men. ( Yeah, the punching other men n saying "wassup buddy??" IS very "manly"!!! ) Sounds like 10-year-olds on the playground to you? Does to most of the women.

For girls, women:
When you put three or more men together, they bond by yelling at the TV and being idiots to each other. Regressing into childlike behavior isn't just a means of amusing themselves — it's their way of escaping real-life pressures and feeling accepted as they are. There's no point in denying guys time to release their juvenile side. And hey, at least they're doing it during boys' night out and not in front of your friends or family!

Another thing I have learnt from my day to day life is that men don’t take hints. ( Men are mad.. take it from me.. If a girl likes a guy, guy will never get to know about her feelings.. he will always think that the "Friendship" button is ON. ) Whether its his friend, wife, girlfriend or sister, he just doesn’t.

I think it is because when men are with other men, they don't tiptoe around each other and drop subtle suggestions. That's because hints don't register with guys.

Women pride themselves on being able to know intuitively what their friends, husbands and kids are thinking, but men have no interest in reading minds.

Strategy learnt from men: "If you don't ask, you don't get." Pretty simple! :P

In relationships, A woman doesn't expect a guy to know exactly what she wants — and whenever she does, she is "surely" disappointed. If, for example, a woman wants him to take her out for her birthday, she is wasting her time dropping hints like "Guess what day Friday is? It's someone's birthday!" If she does that, she'll be 80 before he takes her out. And while she is at it, don't hint about wanting a gift that's shiny and lasts forever: To him, she has just described a set of Emeril pots and pans.
But, if she do asks, clearly, chances are she will get it.
Be it an expensive ring or a loving kiss or a warm hug, she should not hesitate to ask them for it.

Coming down to a more domestic level, women should all know that men don’t do their laundry until they are out of clean clothes. If this happens before then that means someone else is doing their laundry for them.
Sometimes, their dirty laundry even comes in several categories:
1. Looks fine/smells fine,
2. Looks fine/smells bad,
3. Looks dirty/smells fine.

Unless you intend to wash it, do not try to disrupt piles organized in this manner.

A couple more things to keep in mind:
For girls, women:
1. Don’t make him hold your purse in the mall. It does something to his manhood. Just spare him the misery.
2. Shopping is not fascinating. Ever.
3. If he has to sit through :
“Notting Hill ( 1999, Starring : Julia Roberts, Hugh Grants, Genre : Comedy | Romance )”,
you have to sit through :
“Die Hard((Series) Starring : Bruce Willis, Genre : Action | Crime | Thriller )" .
4. If you truly want honesty, don’t ask questions you don’t really want them answer to.
5. He was not looking at that other girl. Well, okay… maybe a little. Okay, so what! He was looking at her. Big deal. Like you never looked at another guy…
6. Any sort of injury involving the testicles is not funny. Seriously.
7. Any attempt by a man to prepare food, no matter how feeble (i.e.: Microwaving a burrito, fixing Spaghetti, etc) should be met with roughly the same degree of praise a parent might shower upon their infant when it walks for the first time.
8. But in the end, remember that men are human. We all are. We are unique and we have our own individuality. You will not go anywhere in understanding someone if you keep on putting them in one stereotypical category or another.

Good luck Ladies! :)

Loving You...

Tell me my darling,
How does it feel…
How does it feel when I hold your hand and walk with you letting you lead?
How does it feel when my stare lingers on you for just a little longer every time I see you?
How does it feel when I lightly brush my fingers across your arm while passing by?

Tell me my sweetheart,
How does it feel…
How does it feel when my lips tremble and my body becomes weak as you kiss me?
How does it feel when I give myself to you in the most vulnerable of times?
How does it feel when I dig my nails into your bare back while quivering in ecstasy?
How does it feel when we dance on the kitchen floor at the oddest hour?
How does it feel when I put my head on your heart?

Tell me beloved,
How does it feel…
How does it feel when I cry helplessly while tending to your wounds?
How does it feel when I put the first piece of food in your mouth before I start eating my dinner?
How does it feel when I caress your hair while you peacefully nap in my arms?

Tell me my life,
How does it feel to know that I love you?

Yes,
I am talking about LOVE
I am talking about the love that you feel inside
...The love that will make you cry
...The love that haunts you day and night


So sweety, tell me… how does it feel to know that I love you?

Lying to Myself..

Some things I know I have lied to myself – and this is one of them.

After swearing to destroy all of her things, I know I haven’t really discarded all ... somewhere hidden in an album lie, now yellowing photographs - still beautiful with a hint of those times – in an academic file alongside my notes – I am sure - lies buried - a birthday card – and amongst the modest treasures of my wallet is a guitar pick – that still fancies her touch. ..

Masked cleverly in my words, somewhere lie - subtle references - to memories only one reader can relate...... In empty corridors of a dilapidated structure, there still can be heard - echoes of her laughter and although, now abandoned – there still flows a river - now mourning with salted water.

In the waking hours of some nights, the bed still longs her warmth. And the still air – now devoid of her scent – feels like a vacuum mocking my heart.

On some things I know, I have lied to myself and this is one of them ...... Oh! How I wish there were words that could describe – How much I miss her on some days ....