her rain!

She spent the better part of the night listening to the rain tapping on the window right above her head. She listened as it hit different places of her home - how it sounded on the roof, on the porch, on the ground, at the window. Soon the pipes from the roof were full and started draining. It sounded like a water fall nearby.

Rain is not a single sound but an orchestra full of melodies. It demands attention. You are suddenly not where you were before, floating slowly with the tunes. It makes one want to believe for a moment that we are all dreamers, waiting to completely get away from reality.

She opened the window a bit at some point in the night and let the breeze and some drops fall on her pillow, and her face. She could smell the fall - the wet soil, the wet trees, and the cold air.

She played some blues at 3 in the morning. It was her favorite song. She smiled. The rain stopped. The breeze picked up. The clouds roared. Then the rain began again. She heard the train howling in the distance.

She fell asleep as the morning light started to hit the rain drops. She woke up to a wet, cold pillow and the curtains flying everywhere.

Something wonderful happens to the whole place when it rains...
She woke up smiling.

Madness...

Writing after a long time guys!!
Hope you like it!

She was desperate to find something, anything that would soothe her ache. She wanted to not feel the craziness of her heart. She wanted to forget and not want the things she couldn't have. She wanted to exchange her burned, scarred heart with a brand new one, and she was desperately hunting for the clean heart, for a fresh start.

When she met him, she knew. She knew it was the purest heart she could find, and she had to have it. She was so desperate to clean herself that she did not care if she dirtied him in the process. So the first opportunity she got, she pounced. She dug her nails in his skin, and ripped his chest out. And there it was, the most beautiful thing in the world, and she was about to have it. She was about to rid herself of all her crazy, and all the her madness. It was wonderful.

And yet, no matter what she did, she couldn't take it. He was smarter than she thought, he was better than she thought. She wanted a fix, and he wouldn't allow it. He actually loved her. It was almost cruel.

All she ever wanted was a man who would soothe her madness. That was the only way she knew. But he only burned it more, made her crazier. He was right: the cure was not to fix the crazy but to accept it. She wanted to forget. He made it okay for her to remember

Wish you a very Happy New Year!! God bless!

-omi

Some Tough Choices...

"Its not the chance we take, but the choice we make that determine our destiny. Choose Carefully."

It’s starting all over again.

I am afraid that it is starting all over again.
You know, the stupid silly hi's... the good nights and the good mornings...
The un-ending, time-flying conversations...
The caring and sharing...
I am afraid it is starting all over again.

Usually, life gives us choices. I firmly believe that one almost always have a choice. Sometimes it is a limited choice, still we have a choice. Mostly, we make these choices consciously, sometimes unconsciously but we do make them—almost every day. Whatever comes our way, whatever battle we have raging inside us, we have a choice. It's the choices that make us who we are, and we can always choose to do what's right.

I am trying to make a choice—make it consciously. I wonder how to resist. I wonder if I should resist. Should we resist when life presents us an opportunity which could turn out either good or bad? I have never been afraid of risks. But at the same time I am not very comfortable with putting others at risk with me.

But, what do you do? What do you do when someone so adorable wants to hold your finger and walk a mile with you? What do you do when they trust you to lead the way? What do you do when they look up to you? Respect you for who you are?

There are cute people in your life that would stick with you for the rest of time if you let them. You take it a step further and they will love you for they think you are awesome. But the question is: Do you want to do that? Would you not feel selfish?

Do you want to show them the dark hole of your personality? Are you ready to expose the scars you have been carefully hiding for ages and ages now? Is it time yet? Is it time to trust?

My scars, the scars I carry are still fresh. Healing process is a slow one I suppose. I am afraid that the wounds will open. When is it time to trust someone with our scars? When the scars are totally healed or when they are healing?

I am afraid I will be happy again. I am afraid to feel the pain. Please don’t touch my scars, I say.

I am afraid I am falling for the sweet surrender.
I am afraid it is starting all over again.


-omi